Chapter 12

My head was spinning and my heart was beating fast against my chest. It took me a second to come out of my daze and when I did the realization of what happened hit me - Carlie had pushed me away. I opened my mouth to speak, but she cut me off. The look of anger, hate and determination was strong on her face, but I also caught sadness and pain. Her sweet, soft voice lifted the hairs on the back of my neck, but before I could take comfort in the pleasure she gave me, he words turned sour. "I, Carlie Berry accept your rejection, Adan Williams." She picked up her bag and walked away. My breathing became ragged as I tried to calm myself down. She accepted it? My wolf howled, not out of pleasure like he had done, but out of pure heartbreak, he let the pain take over him. It was an excruciating sound that rang through my mind. Leaning against the lockers, I felt my legs weaken beneath me and uncontrollably my hands lifted to cover my heart. Why isn't this pain going away? And why the hell does it hurt so much? I asked my wolf, but he ignored me. For the second time today, I was alone. Rejected by my wolf. I stood there, my hands clenched tighter over my chest until I knew Carlie had walked out of school. Until the delicious scent of vanilla and roses had faded. I slammed my bedroom door shut and slouched against it falling to the floor, no longer able to hold my own weight. Ever since I had accepted Adan's rejection, a pain was surging through my entire body. Dera immediately called everyone to tell them about what happened. Apparently, according to Emma, when a mate is rejected she or he goes through the beginning phase of the separation. When that mate then accepts the rejection the bond between them begins to break leading both wolves into the first full stage of separation. I didn't give a crap what phase I was in I just wanted the pain to stop. The guys weren't too happy I wanted to be alone. They thought it would be better if I was with someone, but I couldn't face it. I didn't want their pity smiles or small talk. I wanted to be alone with my wolf, despite the fact she hadn't spoken to me, and deal with everything. "Please, talk to me." I begged my wolf. It was the first time since I shifted at thirteen that she had left and I hated it. "Come on, this isn't my fault. He rejected me - no us - first, so what was I supposed to do? I had no other choice. I wouldn't let him treat us like that. To pretend we didn't exist and tell us that he hated us, to be with that girl when he knew we were standing there and he couldn't care less, he didn't care about our feelings, so why should I care about him or his wolf? Why should either of us care?" The tears fell from my eyes. He's mine. She whimpered. And if my heart wasn't already broken, to hear my wolf sounding so weak and hurt would have no doubt broken it. "We'll be okay." I wished those words would be true one day. "I promise." Why didn't he want us? She asked. His wolf did, I could feel him. Her words struck a part of me I hadn't felt before. Was it my fault we were rejected? I scoffed at my stupidity. Of course it was. Adan didn't want me because I didn't look like the eye candy that hung from his neck. Maybe if I had been more like those girls he would have wanted me. He would have been proud to call me his mate and eventually his Luna. He wouldn't have spat those hurtful words at me or looked at me with nothing but hate and disgust. Closing my eyes, I imagined what it would have been like if he acted different in the cafeteria. If, instead of killing me with his eyes, he would have lifted me in his arms and let everyone know I was his and he was mine. That's all I wanted, to love him and be loved in return, to have his arms wrap around me when I was cold, for him to brush away my tears and be strong for me when I was weak. Everything I would have done for him. I could feel the silent tears stream down my face and the ache my wolf had in her heart didn't help slow them down. God, I'm pathetic! I doubted if he was going through the pain we were, he probably couldn't feel a thing. Yet here I sat, curled up on the floor crying over someone who didn't think twice about ripping my heart out and standing all over it. And not just once. No. Six times. Was it even possible for one heart break six times? I was concrete proof that it could. An idea popped into my head and I knew it would make my wolf feel better, not great, but better. "Want to go for a run?" She howled in response as a burst of excitement burst through me and I knew it was from her. Taking the steps two at a time I quickly peeked behind the kitchen door to tell my parents where I was going. My mother gazed up at me through her thick auburn hair as she ferociously stirred cake mix in a bowl. "Be careful Carlie, there is talk of Rogues running about town and there isn't a strong lead on them yet." "Couldn't you go for a run another time?" My father asked as he folded the newspaper and placed it on the kitchen table. "Your mother is right; it's not safe out in the woods at the minute." His forehead wrinkled.