Chapter 7 In My Bed

“Ryan,” I say again, now fully facing him, “what are you doing in my room?” He shrugs. “The door was unlocked.” “And?” “I wanted to be with my wife.” He’s touching my hair now, fingers combing through the mass, causing the hair to fall around my face. His touch is familiar, too familiar. I try to shake off the feeling of déjà vu, but it won't stop. “I don’t want us to fight anymore, Jules. All this is just a little misunderstanding.” I stare at him, my mind still trying to catch up with the fact that he’s here, in my bed, in the middle of the night. “It’s midnight, Ryan. What are you saying exactly? Shouldn’t you be with your girlfriend?” Ryan doesn’t answer right away. Instead, he leans in and presses his lips to mine, soft at first. For a brief second, I lose myself in it—the taste of him, the way his hands cradle my face. But then, reality crashes back in. “Ryan,” I murmur, pulling away. “Stop. This isn’t—” “Shh,” he whispers against my lips. “This is what you want, right? Isn’t this what you’ve been begging for? You want me inside you.” I feel anger rise in my chest. He thinks this is what I’ve wanted? After everything? The late nights of wondering where he was, the way he flaunted Emily in front of me, the betrayal… But before I can form a coherent thought, he’s on top of me, pinning my wrists above my head with one hand, his body pressed against mine. He knows me too well. He knows that despite everything, my body still reacts to him. It’s like he’s using every weakness he knows I have, drawing me in because he believes I’m still that same woman who would fall at his feet, desperate for his attention. But I’m not that woman anymore. I should stop him. I should push him off, tell him I’m not playing this game. But when he drags my nightgown over my head and tosses it aside, I don’t resist. I don’t want to. Instead, I pull him closer, my lips finding his, and for a second, I forget about Emily. I forget about everything. My hands snake around his neck, pulling him in deeper, and I surrender to the heat between us. I’ve missed this—his weight on me, the way he makes my skin burn with just a touch. I’ve missed him, more than I want to admit. But just as I fully give in, Ryan stops. His lips leave mine, his hands fall away, and he pulls back, leaving me cold and exposed beneath him. “What?” I say, breathless, confused. “If you want this to continue,” he says, “you need to drop this whole boyfriend nonsense.” My heart skips. I feel like someone has punched me in the face. All of this, this whole seduction—was just a ploy? A way to manipulate me? I push him off, anger burning through me now. “So that’s what this is? You thought you could come in here, kiss me, and I’d just forget everything?” Ryan sits up. “You’re my wife, Julie. You don’t need anyone else.” I laugh, my voice shaking with rage. “You mean, I don’t get to have anyone else. But you—you get to have your girlfriend, flaunt her in front of me, and still come crawling into my bed when it suits you?” “Jules, be reasonable,” he says, leaning in again as if this conversation isn’t tearing me apart. “We’re still married. This thing with Emily… it’s different. But us—we’re real. Don’t ruin it with some stupid fling.” “You don’t get to decide what I ruin. You already did that when you chose her over me.” Ryan’s face hardens. “You don’t know what you’re talking about. But if you go through with this… boyfriend thing, you're going to start a war you can't win.” I stare right back at him, refusing to give in. “So be it.” For a moment, we just stare at each other. I know he’s waiting for me to break, to take it all back like I usually do, but not this time. Without another word, I turn my back on him. “Get out of my room,” I say. He doesn’t move at first. Then, with a heavy sigh, he stands up. “Fine,” he says. He gives me one last look, then walks to the door. I don’t watch him leave. I can’t. The second I hear the door click shut, I rush over and lock it, my fingers trembling as they twist the bolt into place. As soon as the door is secure, everything I’ve been holding in comes rushing out. I sink to the floor, tears running down my face, my body shaking as I cry. How did we get here? How did the man I once loved with every fiber of my being become this… this stranger, so willing to destroy me? I try to catch my breath, but it feels like the air is suffocating me. I want to scream, to shout, but all I can do is cry. I don’t know how long I stay like that, curled up on the floor, letting my tears soak into the carpet. Minutes? Hours? It feels like a lifetime. But eventually, the sobs begin to fade, leaving behind a cold, empty space inside me. I wipe my eyes, furious at myself for falling apart like this—furious at him for making me feel this way. I’ve been weak for too long, letting him control me, letting him tear me down. But no more. I won’t be that woman anymore. He doesn’t get to have this power over me. He doesn’t get to make me feel small. I push myself up from the floor. I won’t let him win. Not again. I grab my phone, scrolling down to Luke’s number. My thumb hovers over the call button for a second. I take a deep breath and press it. The phone rings once, twice, then I hear Luke’s voice on the other end. “Julie?” he says. “What’s going on?”