Chapter 1

Melissa My head felt like it was going to explode and my heart, ripped out. Nothing prepared me for this; not even the shots of vodka I had last night. I swallowed hard and looked again; this time squinting my eyes to make sure I was seeing right. “Stop,” I quickly told the driver. My eyes were fixed on the black Toyota Corolla that not only looked like my boyfriend’s car but also had his plates. I slammed the car door, finding some notes in my bag. The driver muttered a thank you just before zooming off. I wanted to say a little prayer hoping it was not—but I paused and just looked around. I ran across the pavement, dodging tourists and oncoming cars. I double-checked the road and dashed to the entrance of the building. I tucked my hair strands behind my ear and just as I stood there wondering what Ian could be doing here, I saw the figures. Ian’s hands found their way to grab Helena's waist and they strolled to the entrance of the motel with nothing but smiles. I raised my eyebrow because it wasn’t possible. I followed, making sure to keep my distance so I could observe. My heart skipped at the thought of my best friend having an affair with my boyfriend and my breathing pace increased. I had to do this. Turning back wasn’t an option. Tears saturated in my eyes but I blinked them back and found my way to the reception. The blonde lady took a moment from her call and dropped the telephone before turning to me. “Good day ma’am, welcome to—” “Hey,” I replied hastily. “Can you uh—can you give me the room details of the people who just passed here?” I tilt my head and swallow hard before looking back at her. I didn’t notice anything but her big blue eyes that seemed a little surprised at my request. “I’m sorry, are they expecting you?” I pause. Of course not. “No, but I really need to know if they are lodging here and if they are—“ “I’m sorry ma’am but I can’t disclose any information. It’s against the hotel’s policy.” “That’s my boyfriend and—” I paused before I got the chance to say best friend. Who goes to a hotel with her best friend’s boyfriend?? My lips became so dry that I had to wet it before exhaling audibly. I wished to protest but she didn’t look like she was going to change her mind. I gave a nod in defeat and turned to leave but her inaudible voice stopped me. “Wait.” I looked at her and her lips curled to the corner. “I can’t disclose much but this isn’t their first time here.” She shook her head. “I’m sorry.” My phone buzzed right in my hands and I stared at the screen. Helena: Girl, this project is killing me. I can’t seem to understand anything so I’m just sitting in the library. What are you up to? What time does your shift end? What the hell? I didn’t even know how to react but first, I looked at the receptionist who was now sympathetically looking at me and worried that I don’t drown myself or fall off a ledge. I turned away and even if I couldn’t seem to see clearly, I kept going. I struggled to maintain a normal pace because it felt like my heart was about to jump out of my chest. It was dark but the road was still buzzing with everyone in their world. I tried to get a grab of my world; working two shifts while trying to get a college degree with a grandma who has dementia and getting to find out that my boyfriend and best friend are fucking each other. I pushed the door to my apartment open and quickly climbed the stairs without looking back. I avoided as many neighbors as I could and the moment I closed the door, I leaned against it. I let the tears find their way down my cheeks and I cussed for letting him get to me; for letting them make me feel this way. I took off my shirt in one reach and headed to the bathroom. There was not much to do to make me feel better, but a cold water bath could at least reduce the pain. I spent the next hour sitting in the bathtub and letting the water reach my neck. I’m not sure what I felt but there was pain, anger, and disappointment shooting through my spine. I know Ian is young—a second-generation guy with a loud personality but I loved him and that love was killing me. I laid on my bed and shut my eyes. I needed to feel anything that wasn't my heart squeezing. I thought of ways to switch the emotion. I think of the text—did she really consider me a fool? I shifted to smash my phone but there was a knock. A knock that made me pant hard... I tried to catch my breath but Ian walked in. He was simply the most beautiful thing ever with a perfect height and green eyes that could pierce into my soul. He opened the door and our eyes met. “Hey baby,” he said and walked closer. My heart sputtered to a stop and I began to think— is it possible that he was trying to make up for not being present for my birthday yesterday? I paused. “Are you okay?” he asked, lifting his brow and I managed to give a nod. He sat beside me and exhaled. His cologne filled the air and I was unable to think of what was happening. “I think I need a piss.” He walked through the door and it latched behind him. I’m relieved to know I may be wrong about this whole thing. There was a buzz and I glanced toward the phone on the couch. I leaned closer to look at the notification bar. Helena: Take a look at what you caused... Curiosity took a better part of me and I clicked on the message.