Chapter 14 A Burden

MERA I stepped out into the hallway, but I had no idea which side the kitchen was on. I was exhausted when we arrived in New York from France, so Camila took me straight to my room to rest. I headed to the staircase at the end of the hallway. The place was stunning, with a modern, elegant design that exuded wealth. Just how wealthy were they? I wondered if Camila and her brother were staying together or just Camila. As I walked past the beautiful paintings on the wall, I let out a gasp and lightly brushed my fingers against each one, taking care not to damage them. I was an artist myself, and painting had always served as a form of therapy for me. It transported me to a beautiful world free of loneliness and pain. A world in which my dreams could be realized by simply reaching out and touching them with my hand. "This must be the kitchen," I muttered as I walked inside, but I screamed in surprise when someone spoke behind me; I had not expected anyone to be inside. “I’m so sorry; I didn’t mean to scare you. I thought you saw me," Camila said, quickly rising from her chair with an apologetic expression. “It’s okay. It's not your fault; I just had a terrible dream, and my nerves are still shot.” “I’m sorry. Sit down; I’ll make you some tea. Do you want to talk about it?” “No, but thanks for the offer. I can't. I need to get back to the room. Noa might awaken. I just came for some water." “Oh, yeah. Right. Just get some from the fridge behind you. In the morning, I will have Liz stock your fridge. You must be hungry too; I’ll bring something to your room.” “Thank you, but it's late. You don't have to trouble yourself. I—” “It's no trouble. Go, I’ll be up in a minute.” “Thank you.” “You’re welcome.” I returned to the room after that and found Noa still asleep. I sat on the large sofa next to the bed, not wanting to wake Noa since I was still expecting Camila. There were a few magazines on the table, and I took one and browsed through it. After a few minutes, she entered with a tray containing a covered dish. When our eyes met, she gave me a soft smile, which I returned, feeling deeply grateful for her kindness. She set the tray on the small glass table in front of me and took a seat next to me. The mouth-watering aroma filled the room and I complimented the food after uncovering the dish. There was even dessert. When I asked if she had made the food, she said she had their chef prepare it for me. "My nana always said there is nothing like a good home-cooked meal to make someone feel at home—" she began to say but stopped in mid-sentence, her face turning into a worried frown. "What's wrong?" she asked, looking at my teary eyes, making me feel bad for worrying her, but I couldn't help myself. I was overcome with emotion by the level of care she had shown since we first met. I had no idea what I would have done or where I would have been if they had not found us and helped us. “I'm sorry. It's just that you've done so much for us, and I haven’t even said thank you. Thank you, Camila. Thank you for everything you have done for us," I said, wiping away the one tear that had managed to escape, as she reached for my hand. “You’re welcome. You're very brave, Mera. I admire you. What you did took courage. "You are a good mother, and I hope your stepparents rot in hell for what they did to you," she said, lightly squeezing my hand and smiling reassuringly. But something tugged at my heart, and guilt washed over me as she spoke. I lied to her when I told her my story. I told her that my father was not my real father. I was afraid that if I told her the truth, she would not understand the gravity of my situation. I opened my mouth, intending to confess, but Noa awoke. ‘It’s okay, eat. ‘I’ll get him,’ she said, getting up and walking over to the bed. ” I started eating while Camila gently rocked Noa in her arms. My body was still exhausted. I didn't even feel like eating or lying down, but I knew my body needed my strength to care for him. Camila’s voice pulled me from my thoughts. "Have you ever been to New York before?" she asked in her soft and friendly tone, and I shook my head. “No, never,” I said after swallowing. "My family and I traveled quite a bit, but they preferred to visit the same places each time... familiarity, I suppose. New York was always one of those places we discussed but never visited." "You will love it," she said, smiling down at Noa, who was holding one of her fingers. The way she looked at him made my chest warm; it was with so much love and I wondered if she had children of her own. “I’ll take you to Central Park, the museums, the Met, and Times Square just to see the lights... maybe not the crowd, but it’s something everyone should see at least once. And you’ll love the little cafés in SoHo. We’ll go everywhere.” Her enthusiasm was contagious, and I found myself smiling while listening. It was a life I had never imagined myself having, but one I suddenly wanted. Not just for me, but for Noa. I had so many questions. Did she and Camilo live together? I wanted to ask, but I held back. Did she have any other siblings? Any other family nearby? I had no idea how much I was intruding into their lives or how long I would be allowed to stay. And I knew I needed to figure things out for myself, and quickly. I would need my own place. I could not keep burdening them forever. I would need to find a job, which meant arranging childcare and obtaining new documents—things I was terrified of even thinking about. I was terrified of touching any of my old bank accounts, as they could be monitored and traced. The last thing I needed was someone finding me, finding us. I glanced at Noa again. He had begun to fall asleep in Camila's arms. I hated being a burden, but I would do anything to keep him safe. That was the promise I had made to myself since the beginning. If that meant being a burden for now, so be it. I would grin and bear it for him. I reminded myself that I am a quick learner. I would figure out the trains, roads, language, and systems. I would work hard, save, and rebuild. I would be okay. I had to believe that. But even with those thoughts racing through my mind, there was a deep ache in my chest that would not go away. A heavy, hollow sadness that persisted no matter how hard I tried to ignore it. I had lost everything... my home, my father, and my entire life as I knew it. It was not simply about starting over. It was about surviving after everything you knew had fallen apart. I blinked quickly, swallowing past the lump in my throat, just as Noa stirred slightly. I was done eating and reached for him, brushing my fingers against his cheek as I thanked Camila for the dinner, to which she replied that I was welcome. My son was worth every fear, loss, and uncertain step forward. He was the reason I chose this path. And for him, I'd keep going.